Monday, August 22, 2011

Uncle Dyl

If you read my blog at all, you have more than likely heard me mention Uncle Dyl. We LOVE Uncle Dyl. He went camping with us again this last weekend and when we went to leave (in seperate vehicles) AnDee starting crying that she wanted "my Dyl"
Well here is a story about Dyl on our camping trip...
He went with us to Flaming Gorge in July too. There have been a lot of bear sightings up there recently and he caught wind that if he was sleeping in a tent he needed to be careful. So we let the dogs sleep in their kennel right outside of his tent to help keep the bears away. Well one night Dyl woke up to the dogs growling a little and whining. Suddenly he heard the door to their kennel bang open and the dogs took off. A few minutes later he could hear something outside his tent. Convinced the dogs high tailed it outta there to escape a bear he sat terrified alone in his tent just waiting for the beast to attack him. He sat as still as he could for over an hour listening to the thing circle his tent, over and over. Too afraid to move cause that would just make him more appealing to the bear!.... when he hears the beast whimper... "betty??" he says. And then he hears the banging of Betty's tail on the tent (her tail is ridiculous)
Yup... thats right... it was the dogs the entire time. They got cold and busted out of the kennel. He sat terrified in his tent for over and hour waiting to be eaten alive by Betty.
I told you that story to tell you this story...
Last weekend while we were camping Andrew was also hunting. Dyl and Andrew went out one night to see what they could see and they saw zero elk... not one... but they did see two bear. Two bear = Dyls terrifying memories of our last trip up there and the long night he spent hiding from the dogs.
That night we all went to bed. Andrew and I and the kids in the trailer, Dyl in his tent and AnDee's other favorite Uncle (she actually has 3 favorite uncles... none of which are ACTUALLY her uncle) Dave in his tent.
AnDee's 3 favorite "uncles"

We had been asleep for a few ours when I wake up to a banging noise. The only thing I can imagine it being is someone banging the dutch oven lid with a stick or something. Im not sure what it is but it is loud! and then I hear it...
"Dave?! Dave?!" Dyl is yelling at the top of his lungs and he sounds beyond angry.
"If you're messing with my tent I WILL KILL YOU!"
"What?" I hear Dave reply
"If that is you messing with my tent, you're DEAD"
"Im not doing anything to your tent"
"you promise its not you?"
"Yeah dude, I promise"
I hear a  tent unzip and see some flashlights turn on. I catch a little more of the conversation... things like
"there is something out here dude. Hunter was growling and something has been messing with my tent for the last two hours. Im sleeping in the truck and I would suggest you do too"
"I can't stop shaking! Im freaking out so bad right now"
Every time I hear Dave reply I can sense he is trying his best not to laugh.
Soon things settle down and we all go back to sleep. When morning comes around Dyl staggers out of the truck looking like he is completely hung over. Of course I had to get the whole story from him cause I only caught part of it. So over breakfast this is what we got...
Before he had even fallen asleep something (of course after his bear sighting, he was convinced it was a bear) started playing with his tent. At first he thought it was Dave and/or Andrew just messing with him. So he thought he would ignore it and they would give up and go away. But after a significant amount of time he decided that couldn't be it. He was so scared that he didn't dare move and was even trying not to breath until the thing made a noise, so as to cover up his breathing noise with the things noise. After about an hour of that and praying it would go away he decided he need to get up and in position to "Bear Grills" it as he would put it. Which evidently means  'slit its throat with a pocket knife'? But in order to do that, he had to wait for it to make noise so he could move without it hearing him (just like the breathing) It took him well over 30 minutes to escape his sleeping bag, get in a sitting position and get the knife in his hand. Again... he sat in that position... waiting for the beast to come after him! Who knows how long he sat there before he decided he needed to act. So what did he do? What would anyone do in that position? He pulled out two poles from his cot and started banging them together (Hence the dutch oven noise I thought I was hearing) That is also when he started yelling at Dave.
We don't know what it was... coons? squirrels? bear? ok... lets be honest, it wasn't a bear.
He later admitted to us that he was "about ready to light his pants on fire"
uh.... what? Should I even ask?
"why would you light your pants on fire Dyl?" (And yes I am laughing to the point of tears at this point.)
"because bears are scared of fire"
duh! Lighting your pants on fire is the obvious way to scare a bear away.
He also told us he thought about taking his pocket knife, cutting a whole in his tent and making a run for the truck but he was scared it would be locked and then he would be stuck outside with the man eating creature. Because unzipping the door to the tent would take too much time. Slashing it with a knife makes much more sense.
Im pretty sure he will never go camping up there with us again. This morning I got a text from him saying "Im so happy to be going to sleep in a bear free environment" (he works graveyards so he was just going to bed)
"Well if a bear happens to make its way in to your house, don't hesitate to light your pants on fire" I replied
"Nah... Ill just cut a hole in my window and make a break for my truck"
I love this kid...

1 comment:

  1. i miss you guys so much right now! i still haven't even seen whit since she's been home!